


Midnight Teachings

by tendous_satoris



Series: Impressions Universe [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: DON'T TAKE YAHABA'S ADVICE, Futakuchi Kenji is A Dick, Humor, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, IT'S BULLSHIT, M/M, also, i have no idea what this is, this is so stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-20 07:59:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9481943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tendous_satoris/pseuds/tendous_satoris
Summary: Kenji can't sleep.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Futakuchi and Yahaba couldn't sleep, so they decided to show each other their voice talents and teach each other how to do it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't sleep last night and I wrote this in hopes of making Futakuchi suffer with me but this happened instead ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Enjoy

Kenji can't sleep, plain and simple.

 

He'd tried everything, from counting sheep to blinking 100 times like his sister had shown him on the internet one time, but nothing was working.

 

He was in the middle of trying sleeping in a different position than normal when he heard the whisper.

 

“Hey, Kenji, you can't sleep either?”

 

He was having a sleepover with his 4 amazing boyfriends at Yahaba’s house. Ennoshita and Terushima were cuddled together cutely on the floor, and Shirabu had decided to take the couch since he kicked in his sleep.

 

Yahaba was next to Kenji on the floor, where Kenji had _thought_ he had been asleep.

 

“Nope.” He whispered back.

 

“Want me to teach you how to do impressions?”

 

“Uh, okay? I thought you didn't know.” He said as they stood up to go off to where Yahaba used to have a playroom as a kid, so they could talk normally.

 

“I only tell people that so they won't bother me about it.” He shrugged, sitting down in a cross-legged position on the hardwood floor, and motioning for Kenji to do the same. “I can totally teach people. I've done it before.”

 

“Okay. And in return, I will show you some _really_ cool acting stuff I can do.” He nodded once he was sat down.

 

“Acting stuff? I didn't know you were a good actor, Kenji.” Yahaba hummed.

 

“There's a lot of stuff you don't know about me, Shigeru.” He smiled mysteriously. “Now, how do I do this?”

 

“It's all in the throat and mouth.” He answered. “It's about moving your Adam’s apple up and down for pitch, like Ushijima-san’s low drawl versus Goshiki’s excited squeak, and tongue placement for little vocal tics, like how Tendou-san always speaks with a _little_ more tongue than normal versus how Semi-san swallows a lot.”

 

“Why did you use Shiratorizawa for _all_ of those?” Kenji cocked an eyebrow.

 

“I don't know.” He snapped. “Now, we’ll start with someone easy. Try Kuroo. He's got a pretty easy voice to imitate.” He cleared his throat, before his voice dropped to a low, lazy drawl, stating, “I’m always this nice.”

 

“Heh, nice.” He laughed, before attempting it himself, “I'm always this nice.” It was near-indistinguishable.

 

“Awesome!” He smiled. “Now, let's try someone harder, with more tics…” He thought for a moment, before saying, “How about Bokuto-san?”

 

“What are his tics?”

 

“Loud, deep, lots of tongue, not nasally _at all_.”

 

“Okay…” He thought you a moment, then tried, “Hey, hey, hey!”

 

“Pretty good for your first time.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

“And now, we move onto the harder stuff, that requires _serious_ pitch changing.” He looked Kenji directly in the eye. “Hinata.”

 

“Oh, please, that's _easy_ .” He smiled a bright, sunny smile highly reminiscent of the first year, saying, “I may be short, but I can _jump_!”

 

“Why was _that_ one better than your Bokuto impression?!” Yahaba’s eyes were wide and confused. “It should be _much_ easier to do voices closer to your _own_ vocal pitch because they put less strain on them. Yet, yours seem to get better at it the higher we go.” He narrowed his eyes. “Are you hiding something?”

 

“Yes.” He admitted. “Since my new talent has pretty much been perfected at this point, how about I tell you what I’m hiding?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

 

“Shoot.”

 

“Name a manager.”

 

“Yachi from Karasuno.”

 

“Oh, the one you had a crush on for a while?” He snickered at Yahaba’s nod, before swallowing, clearing his throat, and leaning forward into a position to look up at Yahaba, as if he was shorter.

 

“H-hi, Yahaba-senpai!” He said in a _perfect_ imitation of Yachi’s high, sweet voice, blinking innocently. “I-I really like you!”

 

Yahaba’s face turned the colour of a _strawberry_ . “W-what the _fuck_?!”

 

Kenji _cackled_ . “Man, I will _never_ get over the look on people’s faces when I do that to them!”

 

“What the fuck was _that_ , man?” Yahaba asked, a bit forcefully.

 

“That was my voice thing.” He grinned. “You can do impressions of boys, Kenjirou can growl like a rabid animal and can make his voice super smooth, Chikara can make his rock hard and scary, Yuuji can do a _great_ falsetto while singing, and I can do impressions of girls. And accents.”

 

“B-but why'd you have to say _that_?!” He complained, still trying to cool down his face.

 

“Because it's really fucking funny, that's why.” He resumed the previous position of being under him, and decided to continue, saying, “Y-Yahaba-senpai, you didn't respond. D-do you like me back? It's okay if you don't…” He shifted as if he really was a schoolgirl doing a confession to her crush, looking at him with big brown doe eyes Yahaba probably hadn't even known Kenji was possible of doing.

 

“Please stop, Kenji…” Yahaba moaned. “Just… it's too early for this.”

 

“Fine.” He didn't move, though. “ _If_ you answer _Yachi_.”

 

“ _What?!_ ”

 

“Y-Yahaba-senpai, I'm kind of in a hurry, I need to go.” His voice had taken on that adorable, high pitched tone again. “Please answer?~”

 

He let out a withering sigh, looking his boyfriend directly in the eye, and, though he felt _very_ stupid, said, “I'm sorry, Yachi, I have 4 boyfriends.”

 

His eyes widened. “Oh my god, I am so sorry! I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable or anything…” He said in, once again, a perfect impression of Yachi's nervous babbling, this time making Yahaba laugh.

 

“Y’know, you should start one of those Tumblr blogs, where you dub funny comics on there. Make some artist’s _life_.” The Seijoh captain suggested, grinning. “Plus, you're a good singer, too. You could do covers of songs.”

 

“Why don't you?” Kenji asked.

 

“Because I can only do boys. You can do both, now that I've taught you, so you could _totally_ do it!” His grin faded to a simple smile, and he asked, “Now, what was all this ‘actor stuff’ you talked about?”

 

“Well, that was one, obviously.” He told him. “The others being: I can cry on command, blush on command, and make _very_ convincing sex noises.”

 

“Y’know, I don't think I've ever seen you blush. Can I see that?”

 

“Sure.” He looked up to the top right, which Yahaba hopefully recognised as the universal sign for remembering something, and, upon being able to remember something sufficiently embarrassing, felt his face heat up to a pretty red shade.

 

“I have to admit, I'll have to make you blush more, your face gets all red, it's really pretty.” Yahaba grinned. “Now, I'm sure there's a pretty simple explanation for this one.”

 

“Thinking of something embarrassing and talent, my dear, Shigeru.” He smiled. “Now, do you want to see some of the _other_ stuff?”

 

“Aw, I wanted to see you flustered.” He pouted, though he let it go. “How about the crying? Why'd you learn how to do that?”

 

“I've learned that people tend to show their _true_ selves around crying people. For example, Kogane panics whenever he sees someone cry, my evil older brother yells at them, and Mai is actually pretty good at comforting people.” He smiled. “So, I decided to do a little social experiment a few years ago, where I sat on a bench in a park and _bawled my eyes out_. That's actually how I met Yuuji, he tried to comfort me.”

 

“You really are a dick.”

 

“So I've been told.” He sighed. “Now, do you want to see it, or…?”

 

“Eh, why not, it's only 3 AM, we've still got a couple hours before Chikara’s natural alarm clock wakes him up. Plus, I'm actually pretty good with crying people.” He shrugged. “Now, lay it on me.”

 

Looking at him for a second, his eyebrows pinched together ever-so-slightly, and his eyes pooled over with tears.

 

“S-Shigeru…” He murmured in a small voice. “I-I don't know what t-to do…”

 

“What’s wrong?” He played along.

 

“N-nothing.” He sniffed. “I-it’s no big deal.”

 

“Tell me.”

 

“W-well, I-I just…” He seemed to be struggling to find a reason and sighed. “Can I stop?”

 

“Yeah.” He laughed. “I just wanted to see if you could come up with a reason on the spot.”

 

“Can’t _wait_ to freak out Kenjirou with all this stuff now.” He yawned.

 

“Oh, hey, you yawned! Think you can sleep now?”

 

“Yeah, probably.” He smiled. “Thanks. That was really fun.”

 

“Yeah. By the way, can you teach me how to do a girl voice sometime?” Yahaba asked. “I’d say you could do it now, but you look pretty tired.”

 

“Nah, I could do it.” He shrugged. “It’s all about the Adam’s apple. Like, it’s a bit difficult, but once you get the hang of it, you can voice girls a range of voices.”

 

Then he smiled again. “Like, Shirofuku-san, her voice is _totally_ different from Yachi's.”

 

“Do it.”

 

“Oh, Bokuto~. Do you have the money you owe me?~” He asked in Shirofuku’s voice.

 

Yahaba laughed. “That’s sick.”

 

After another yawn, Yahaba suggested they go back to bed, to see if they could sleep now.

 

“All right, night, babe.” Kenji smiled. He put his arms around Yahaba’s waist in a spooning gesture, and they fell into a blissful, restful sleep.

  
**_fin._ **  

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what that was. 
> 
> As usual, please comment and kudos! 
> 
> Erica out~ <3


End file.
